UltraCrispy Issue #1 has been posted, and with that I say goodbye to IRKWORKS. Well, the web site will remain, but I will no longer update it. The same goes for the IRKWORKS LiveJournal site. See ya at UltraCrispy and the UltraCrispy blog from now on.

-Chris P. AKA Crispy

Tags: goodbye

Hello, sports fans! I hereby notify my fellow cybercitizens of my imminent return to the internet. I'll be posting comics again, but not at IRKWORKS. New work shall appear at

UltraCrispy.com

("Crispy," as in "Chris P.," as in "me." "Ultra" as in "inferiority complex.")

Things will be a little different over there. Each update, or "issue,"  will be in the form of a large "wall of images" -- a hodgepodge of comic strips, illustrations, and other visual stimuli. This time around I'm cranking up the experimentation and toning down the self-censorship. I'm not alone, either. Work by others is to be featured as well. Here's a useless preview:

Tags: ultracrispy

I could probably say IRKWORKS.com will never be updated again, but I suppose there is still the slimmest of chances I'll change my mind. That said, I don't plan on removing IRKWORKS content from the web anytime soon.

I have several reasons for going on hiatus, none of which includes quitting comics. Instead, I'd like to shift my efforts to getting published. If that fails, then I'll come crawling back to the cold, slimy embrace of the internet. However, I'd post comics at a different web site. (I just can't stand the name "irkworks.com.") Whether it's in print or on the web, I'll probably make comics that deviate from my usual schtick. Something a little more innovative or unique. Something that does a better job of holding my interest and igniting my passions. Well, until then, see you later.

I know the "webcomics community" (barf) has a massive, veiny, throbbing hard-on for ComicPress but it's annoying the feces out of me. Maybe it's not ComicPress per se, but rather how so many people choose to set it up. Perhaps it's all the default settings people don't bother to change. Whatever it is, it's giving a sameyness to a lot of sites that are setting off the alarms of my overfamiliarity detectors. For example, I hate those lame << navigational brackets (not arrows, mind you) above and to the right of the comic. And then there are those pathetic, tiny "next" and "previous" links below the comics. Please. Give me huge honkin' navigational arrows (not brackets) below the comic, and preferably above as well. There are other less identifiable factors that spread uniform genericness across webcomic sites. I don't know if it's the fonts used or the placement of logos or what. But when I get this feeling of sterile yuckness, all I have to do is scroll to the bottom of the page and see the inevitable "This lame comic is powered by WordPress with ComicPress." My curmudgeonry is powered by your lameness. By the way, can we stop saying "powered by" now? If we can elect a black president, I think we can also manage to drop some artifacts from the mid-90s' information superhighway.

PS I'm aware my own web site could use some improvements, but I'd still rather look at that than anything ComicPressed.

PPS I'm equally annoyed by all those YouTube videos that begin with a blue screen and scrolling white text. What fart is that?

Tags: comicpress
Current Mood: cheerful

It says so right here.

Tags: woman
Current Mood: bitchy

You know the cliche where people say, "Hey, we're in the 00's. Where are the flying cars and jet packs?"  Forget that. What I want to know is, "Where are the robots that are supposed to do our work for us?" I'm pretty sure that there were futurists in the 50's or 60's who predicted that by now we would have labor-saving machines that allow us to work much fewer hours. But it seems that all technology did was create more work for us to do.

Speaking of work, this article disgusted me. I wasn't put off by the slackers. No, I was put off by the money-grubbing workaholics who don't seem to realize what matters in life. But then again, I'm just a wee bit biased, for I am.... A SLACKER!

I just can't stop slacking. I'm the laziest person I know. But now is not the time to slack on the job. Not in this economy. Not with a baby and a mortgage I can barely afford. I just hate this job so much. OK, so look for another job. I did, without success despite several interviews. Granted I could have applied for more jobs, but the truth is I hate this field of work. Engineering in theory is cool. In reality (or at least in my experience) it sucks. Maybe I'm just not good enough at it to get more rewarding engineering work. Fine then look for another job in a field that you love. The fields I love don't pay enough to support my family's lifestyle. Plus, I would probably have to go back to school to be qualified to work in other fields. I can't afford schooling. Also, college was traumatic for me. Well, maybe you should lead a less expensive lifestyle. Yeah, tell my wife we ought to downgrade. Besides, we're not living extravagantly by any means. Be a man and suck it up like the rest of us, you sniveling little pansy. While you whimper about your comfy middle class life, there are people starving...  Yeah, I know. I know. Say, anything good at digg.com?

Tags: slacker, slacking

So here I am in my cubicle getting the shit depressed out of me as usual, except as an added annoyance co-workers are "celebrating" Halloween. The three "costumes" I've seen so far are as follows: pajamas (actually just sweat pants and a t-shirt), hunting camouflage, and doctor's scrubs. Words... they fail me. I bet I will soon see other favorite non-costumes such as the sports uniform and the rainbow-colored wig.

Later this afternoon, fully grown adults will go cubicle to cubicle trick-or-treating and then proceed to harrass me for not providing their fat fucking asses with candy. Maybe they're right. Maybe I should get more into the Halloween spirit. Yeah, how about I dress up as a mailman and go postal?

For the record, I like Halloween. I even dressed up for it at my previous workplace. The people there were cool. They wore actual costumes and didn't beg for candy. Once I went as the Hamburglar. The mask I wore over my eyes limited my peripheral vision. So when I told a friend, "If I were a porn star I'd be the Furburglar," I didn't see the female co-worker to my left. Luckily she only laughed at me. If it happened here I'm sure I'd be clearing out my desk due to alleged sexual harrassment.

So Happy Halloween, everyone. If you need a (non)costume idea you can go as me, the disgruntled, passive-agressive, powerless, office peon.

Tags: halloween
Current Mood: bitchy

Because the world anxiously awaits the next IRK comic, here's a little update. I loaded a bunch of software onto my backup computer and verified that it has what it takes to handle my comic-making abuses. Now I just need to decide whether to start a new comic, or re-do the half-finished comic I (may have) lost on the computer that crashed. Or... neither?

When my web site went down for a few days not too long ago, my internet traffic took a big hit. When traffic was at its lowest my reaction was not, "Oh no!" My reaction was, "No one left to please. I'm finally free!" I think I'm putting to much pressure on myself to please a handful of (mostly) ungrateful strangers. I love drawing. I just need to figure out how to make the experience more rewarding. Maybe I ought to stop looking at the traffic statistics. But then why post my comics at all? Man, what a headcase, eh? Apparently there aren't enough problems in the world for me to worry about.

I expected to do some comicking Sunday night, but the power went out. This happens to us way too often. We must have accidentally signed up with third-world-country-style electric service or something. It would warm my heart to know that someone got Chinese water torture over this because it totally hosed my computer.

I think the wind was the official cause of the outage. Not lightning or anything interesting. The wind. The wussy-ass wind. And just to rub it in, all the houses across the street did NOT lose power. But that's not enough. Apparently losing power can now totally incapacitate a computer. My home computer gets a show-stopping error every time it tries to run Windows. This is a bit of a problem seeing that I use my computer for every step of comic creation, including initial sketches. I fear the solution will result in losing all my hard drive data. There are enough files I haven't backed up (including the latest comic in progress) for me to be justifiably full of impotent rage.

I at least managed to get an old, back-up computer running last night. It won't bring back any lost files, but hopefully it can handle the rigors of digital comic-making until my regular computer returns to health. Until then... IMPOTENT RAGE!

2nd UPDATE (10/16/08): Apparently irkworks.com is back up.

UPDATE: Yep, it was an unpaid web hosting bill because my credit card info was outdated. Irkworks.com should be back soon.

***

In case anyone noticed that irkworks.com is down, I'm just letting people know that I did NOT throw a tantrum and shut down the site. The issue might be with my web hosting account. Maybe I forgot to pay a web hosting bill or something. Anyway, I can't look into the issue while I'm at work because my obnoxious employer's idiotic internet content filter blocks me from accessing certain web sites. Hopefully I'll resolve the problem tonight.

So, I've been getting into the groove making comics again. I thought I'd be able to post a new comic this week, but life's getting busy again. Well, if I don't post it this week, then I'll do it next week. After this week, I think life will stop being an asshole for awhile and let me spend more time on comics. (Man, I'm just begging to be jinxed, aren't I?)